A Life Full of Scrap

Feels like a fool all over again...

I hate this feeling; feeling of insecure, feeling of as though you're being used, feeling of being treated like a "pelampung", feeling of betrayals and the past which still haunt me till today, feeling of emptiness, feeling of sorrow deep within me.

I thought I was feeling better but that's not the case... my emo mood strike me this weekend out of no reason.

I hate my ex but yet I still cares. Why so? Shouldn't I let go already by now? Why am I so pathetic to be even think or wonder how he is when he don't even bloody care how I am doing...!!! I am such a fool!!! Why can't I just get rid of that old die hard habit? Why I still care for a heartless person like him?

To make things worst, I think K isn't who I think he is... I think I am right about games and stuff and he is just another player just like every other guy that came by... I made up my mind I wouldn't answer his phone calls for the coming days... like I ignore his sms yesterday after he called up while I was having my drinking session with smalls. We didn't talk much just a hi and where are you thing... and I malas layan him already so I just say bye after that.

I really need PEACE... PEACE of MIND! Argh~ I hate him and him too! I don't need shit like this for now... maybe that's the best for now. Though a little lonely but at least I get peace.

Yeah... I shouldn't be a fool. Guys that came by around me are all useless bastard! I'm better off without any of them in my life!