A Life Full of Scrap

It all started 2 days ago, both my work and personal life just turn from good too bad and bad to worst!

I'll start with my work first, previously I mention that I will be somehow helping out the youth segment as an additional well this time I'm going to be permanently move there and that I will be reporting to 2 new bosses. Why is that so? Why so sudden? No discussion were made with me just a sudden decision made by the bosses because of a stupid bitch who couldn't handle her bloody job all she knows is to act her farking cute face thinking she is pretty and cry almost every farking day! Honestly, I am not happy about it. I don't mind moving to youth segment while passing over 3 of the segments I'm handling to that bitch for the sake of my own personal career growth. I will definitely learn a lot there because there will be a lot of 360 campaign and yeah I've been there done that before it's hell a lot of work! Worst thing I won't be under Sean anymore... which is my biggest concern for now. He has given me the liberty to do what I want as long as I get the job done. Having said that, he sees through everything quietly just in case I need him. He is the best boss on earth but now... changing to Yen who loves to complain, strict, organised kind of person I have to start from scratch... which I am capable of but not happy doing it! Why must I bear this shit just because someone runs to the big boss's room and cry like a baby! I started farking fresh too and that time I was doing 3 segments already WTF! Useless bitch! What more she is brainless =.=" no offence yeah she is... I'm not going to just sit there and take this shit! Wait for the drama babe~ I haven't do anything that's because whatever Sean said I will follow without a second word I just go OK~ but it's time I take out the wild card and do some show! I've told Sean I need his time to discuss on this. We shall see how it goes... bottom line is I am pissed because they just informed me without discussing it with me! Both of us are getting farking same pay why should I work more and she just sit and relax. Hell actually I've started helping in the youth team while still juggling with my own 3 segments and what did that bitch do? One farking DiGi Campus only the POSMs WOW~ that's so great! STUPID!

ARGH! I wish to slap kau her face! What more to say she is a real bitch apparently she already have a bf and rumors going round said she is having affair with one of our team member the art director. Only fark kau 2 months here and she already acted like a bitch! She is smart I know... acting stupid and cry to get people's sympathy... I will play this farking game with her! Wait for my drama BITCH!

On that same farking day, I fought with him again yeah and we haven't spoken to each other till today. I miss him though... How did it happened? It was a perfect day until he started to act all weird and awkward... we were just talking msn-ed each other like normal friends. I am trying to act as normal as possible just as per what he requested. NORMAL FRIENDS! So I am just doing whatever the fark he wants... He became all quiet in the middle of the conversation. Me and my big mouth I had to asked "why you so quiet today?" He said "don't know what to say... I feel awkward..." and I said "I don't talk to you... you said I am mean and I treat you as normal friend you said awkward then you tell me what you want la, I don't know what's on your mind anymore la" and I got pissed off and I said "might as well don't talk to you anymore la if that's the case since you are so uncomfortable even with the idea of just friends" and he said "stop it la don't like that la" and then we both got pissed off usual he will sign off after that. We both really have problems, he couldn't forget his past and how he got hurt same goes to me. The only difference here is I don't mind and he does... So yesterday I sms-ed him said when you had that extra cash just bank it for me and give him my account number. I don't plan to meet him or hang out with him anymore. He couldn't make up his bloody mind then I don't want to get involve either. However, I couldn't help feeling like a fool again. I feel my already bruised heart got another punch from him. It's like I thought I am able to stand up and start a new life and little did I know I step on another hole and fell down again and my face hit that cold hard floor! It's not fun this time because I couldn't cry anymore... I couldn't express myself... I had no one that could understand me... that could even care a little about me. My parents? Never care about such things. My sister? Don't even mention. My friends? Bz with their own life. Everybody said I don't let people around me to care about me and how are they going to care. That's just not true... but then again even if they care what can they do? Not like they could take away the pain and suffering I am going through.

Alex if you're reading this. I hope you are happy because it's all started from you. I won't say I hate you anymore because I have no feelings left for you. If I could I would erase you from my memory!